Google Search

Saturday, August 18, 2012

A Short Video on Living and Dying

A Short Video on Living and Dying

In the midst of teaching a workshop with doctors and nurses on the subject of compassion, Frank Ostaeseski had a heart attack. This led to a triple bypass surgery and a close brush with death. It was a real-life lesson in living and dying.

This short video features the founder of the Metta Institute suggesting we don’t take life for granted and live deeply and fully. He offers some great thoughts on how precarious and precious our time alive is. Don’t waste a moment.

Good advice! Check it out.


Leave a Comment so far
Leave a comment

View the original article here

Friday, August 17, 2012

Square Peg in a Round Hole

Square Peg in a Round Hole

A friend recently shared this Speed Bump Death Cartoon. In death, as in life, some folks are simply square pegs trying to fit into round holes. Are you trying to fit in or are you making your own shape for your life? Are you even considering how you would want to be treated before death?

No time like the present for funeral planning and advance directive conversations with family!

Speed Bump cartoon


1 Comment so far
Leave a comment

View the original article here

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Discussing Dying with Parents

Discussing Dying with Parents

Communications over advance directives is one of the toughest conversations to start. End-of-life issues literally scare most families down a path toward a needlessly painful, extended death.

Today’s New York Times Sunday Dialogue is titled Discussing Dying With Loved Ones. It’s an exchange of letters on the topic of how aging parents, their children and doctors face — or avoid — the reality of death. Some great quotes from readers:

… Except for those suffering from advanced dementia, older adults are quite capable of raising the topic of their end-of-life wishes. As functioning adults whose quality of life and experience of dying are on the line, certainly they bear equal responsibility for initiating the discussion….

ANNE-MARIE HISLOP

… This is the elephant in the room that no politician or policy maker is willing to put out there for a rational national debate. Doctors, nurses and other caregivers do not gain anything when we pursue futile care, often in intensive care settings with extremely expensive protocols, because a patient and/or the family “wants everything done.”

Our collective answer needs to be: “We’ve already done everything, and now it’s time not for rationing, but for rational care.” We need to face the limitations of our abilities, and the need to let the life of a loved one have a natural ending.

ALAN SANDERS

… I suspect that a lot of our reluctance to talk about end-of-life planning has more to do with our fear of losing our parents than with their fear of death. Most elderly people have lost loved ones and are quite aware that death is the ultimate reality.

One thing my mother said that really helped me was, “I don’t want to die, but I’m not afraid to die.” Because of that, I didn’t feel as if I was deciding to kill her; I knew that I was giving her the autonomy she wanted to die with as much peace and dignity as possible.

MARTHA WHITE

… Conversations about end-of-life care should not be postponed until an individual’s final days. We never know when our time will come, or when a loved one may be injured or become ill. Making medical decisions ahead of time, rather than being burdensome, frees individuals to concentrate on the personal and emotional at the end….

EARL BLUMENAUER
Member of Congress, 3rd Dist., Oregon

Read the original column and all of the letters in reply in the New York Times.


2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

View the original article here

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

The Opposite of Live Long and Prosper

The Opposite of Live Long and Prosper

I’m fond of signing copies of A Good Goodbye and ending my talks with the story about how Leonard Nimoy came up with the “Live Long and Prosper” Vulcan greeting. So, this cartoon gave me a chuckle. Thanks to Merv Jersak for sharing this Off The Mark cartoon!

Spock Ticked Off - Off The Mark Cartoon

Kind of looks like he’s throwing a gang sign, no?


Leave a Comment so far
Leave a comment

View the original article here

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Video About Jewish Burial

Video About Jewish Burial

Here’s an interesting short video on Jewish traditions regarding burial versus cremation. A father writes a letter to his son, reconsidering the idea of being cremated and scattered in favor of burial in the traditional manner – naturally green burial!


Leave a Comment so far
Leave a comment

View the original article here

Funeral Board Game in the Works

Funeral Board Game in the Works

FUNERAL DIRECTOR: A Race to Your Final Resting Place is a proposed board game to make funeral planning fun. It’s currently a project at Kickstarter.com, an innovative avenue for independent entrepreneurs to get funding for their creative projects.

The game is best played by four people. They pick a card to learn how they die, then the fun begins as they use coffin-shaped game pieces to navigate the funeral planning process. The game is meant to encourage conversations about disposition choices, funeral costs, environmental impact, personal bucket lists and more.

As creator Ken Kolsun describes it, “FUNERAL DIRECTOR is intended to reveal personal attitudes and beliefs about death and its rituals; it will generate considerable lively conversation. It’s a tricky subject, but playing this game enables people to talk about it without the seriousness usually associated with this subject. Believe me this game experience is fun and speaks to human behavior. Even though we are often curious about the mystery of death, it’s a subject most of us like to avoid; we would like to encourage people to feel open in discussing these issues. Hopefully our game provides a comfortable format.”

Here’s the link to a short video about Ken and his project.

http://kck.st/MB9Yhw

Kickstarter is a major player in a larger new phenomenon called Crowdfunding. It is a way to raise very small to very large amounts of money from large numbers of people to support a project.

If Kickstarter deems your project worthy it gets invitingly posted on the Kickstarter website, which enables a “backer,” that’s anyone, to “donate” money to help the “creator” put together enough funds to make that dream project come true. “Donations” can be made with a click.

Only if the money goal is met by the stated target date does the creator receive the funds. If not, then pledged funds are not collected from the backers. If the donation drive is successful, Kickstarter takes 5% of the proceeds, nothing if the drive is unsuccessful.

Currently, the project has 17 backers who have donated $1,376 toward the goal of $11,000 to fund a proposal package to game manufacturers. The deadline to raise the funds is August 26.

We’ve got The Newly-Dead Game™ as an option to help start the conversation, but we need more games like this out there. Let’s give these folks a hand!


1 Comment so far
Leave a comment

View the original article here

Monday, August 13, 2012

Medicine and Mortality

Today, two items regarding end-of-life and having a conversation about one’s own mortality. Medical directives are imperative to ensure living and dying the way you want. The following chat and op-ed give you lots of food for thought.

For more than a year now, Los Angeles Times columnist Steve Lopez has been writing and talking about how we die. On Thursday, he hosted a Google+ Hangout with Dr. Judy Epstein, clinical director of the Compassion & Choices organization’s End-of-Life Consultation Program, and Kathryn Tucker, director of legal affairs for Compassion & Choices, which advocates for patients’ rights on end-of-life issues. Here’s the video of the chat:

Here’s an op-ed column that appeared in today’s Albuquerque Journal. It was written by Dr. Aroop Mangalik, Professor Emeritus of Medicine at UNM School of Medicine. The paper titled it “Take Control of Life, Death.”

If you want to be comfortable, happy and be with your family and friends when you are facing a serious illness or are likely to die in the near future, you need to take control.

In recent decades, there has been what some have called “medicalization of death.” There have been many advances in medicine and a lot of people are living healthier, longer lives.

But ultimately, we all have to die.

Medicalization of death has occurred, to a significant degree, because we – society, patients and doctors – have not taken into account the fact that there are limits to life and that medical interventions can only do so much.

Understanding this reality is a major step that must be taken to get the best outcome for the patient.

How does one understand this? How do we take control of the situation?

The knowledge you need to get will necessarily come from your medical provider. The best decisions are made by having the facts – available treatment options and the likely outcomes.

Ask your provider about the nature of the illness and what is expected without any treatment.

The next steps will be to get a clear picture of what treatments are available. You should be able to get some idea of how likely it is that the treatments will improve the outcome for you.

This includes information on previous success and failures with available options. At least try to find out if the treatment is “very likely,” “likely,” or “not likely” to help.

Equally, important, you need to know what will be the side-effects of treatment. Will the treatments be harsh or mild, will they last for a short time or will they be persistent.

The cost in dollars is also something that must be considered. In this day of uncertainty we cannot ignore that factor. Many families face bankruptcy because of “long shot” medical treatments.

Once you have the information, you need to decide. It should be your decision based on the best information and input you can get.

If you feel that the treatments available to you are not going to help you achieve your goals, you can refuse those treatments. No one can force you to have a treatment you do not want.

If you choose the path of not taking the treatment, the focus changes from controlling the disease to making your life as comfortable as possible.

The medical team will work with you to control your symptoms. They will help you with pain control, nausea, vomiting, shortness of breath or difficulties in performing day-to-day activities. They will work with you to get the best out of life for whatever time you are alive.

There are many types of experts who are trained to help you. They have overlapping roles and expertise and they work together.

They are referred to as Palliative Care Specialists, Hospice Teams or Symptom Management experts. They all have the goals of making your life better and focus on you.

They also help you and your family so that you die comfortably and with dignity with your family and friends around you.

In certain circumstances, despite their efforts, living may feel like a burden. There are other options that can be utilized.

This is the option of you willfully ending your life at the time you choose. This option has been given a number of names. Physician-assisted death (and) assisted suicide being two common ones.

The option is currently available in Oregon and Washington State. In New Mexico, we are waiting for the courts to decide if such an action would be legal.

In summary, when faced with a serious illness, you should take control of your life and decide what is best for you.

This column is written on Dr. Aroop Mangalik’s personal capacity and is not reflective of the UNM Health Sciences Center.


View the original article here